Drinking Gin Like a Civilized Human Being
Part 2 of 3
Gin and Juice

I don’t know if the whole “Gin and Juice” phenomenon really started in the ghetto, but the way Snoop Dogg talks you’d think he had a patent on it. It’s really just a gin screwdriver. That alone doesn’t sound like much, but it’ll knock you on your non-voting, drive-by-shooting, girlfriend knock-upping, drug-dealing ass if you’re not careful.

For this project we’ll need…gin and juice! Orange juice, beyotch.

Mini-Snoop encourages you to go for the pulp-free variety. My fingers recommend the same.

We start off much like a gin and tonic, filling an old-fashioned glass 2/3 with ice, and following up with a half glass of gin. Aww yeah. We about to get stupid up in here.

“Can I get some juice up in this piece?” We top off with OJ.

A little stir and this shizzle’s ready to drizzle.

If a strong shot of gin normally leaves you gasping for air, give this a try. The OJ makes the gin go down smooth as silk, and before you know it you’ll be passed out on your overgrown dandelion-covered front lawn, right between the rusted-out Trans-Am you’ve got on blocks and some kid’s tricycle with a missing wheel.

If you’re too plastered to make yourself another drink, just stumble your wobbly self about 100 feet thataway to the corner liquor store where you can pick up a bottle of Seagram’s Gin and Juice in Original Citrus flavor – a pre-mixed ready-to-go bottle of essentially the same hooch that’s turned your head to mush just 30 minutes earlier. It’s a little more expensive than the ‘do it yourself’ variety we just made, but it’ll do in a pinch.

The Seagram’s bottle is also a lot easier to ‘hide’ in that brown paper bag, you oh-so-clever drunk.

Coming up tomorrow- the booziest, snootiest, un-fruitiest, “hey has anyone seen my shooesyist” gin drink ever made.

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